Moses, Samson, John the Baptist and Jesus

A young boy had just gotten his driver’s permit and inquired of his father if they could discuss his use of the car. His father said he’d make a deal with his son.

“You bring your grades up from a C to a B average, study your Bible a little, get your hair cut, and we’ll talk about the car.”

The boy thought about that for a moment and decided that he’d settle for the offer, and they agreed on it.

After about six weeks his father said, “Son, I’ve been real proud. You brought your grades up, and I’ve observed that you have been studying your Bible, but I’m real disappointed that you haven’t gotten your hair cut.”

The young man paused a moment then said, “You know, Dad, I’ve been thinking about that, and I’ve noticed in my studies of the Bible that Samson had long hair, John the Baptist had long hair, Moses had long hair, and there’s even a strong argument that Jesus had long hair.”

And his father replied, “Did you also notice that they all walked everywhere they went?”

Submitted by Ken K.

Grand theft auto …

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The light turned yellow, just in front of him. He did the right thing, stopping at the crosswalk, even though he could have beaten the red light by accelerating through the intersection.
 
The tailgating woman was furious and honked her horn, screaming in frustration, as she missed her chance to get through the intersection, dropping her cell phone and makeup.
 
As she was still in mid-rant, she heard a tap on her window and looked up into the face of a very serious police officer. The officer ordered her to exit her car with her hands up..
 
He took her to the police station where she was searched, fingerprinted, photographed, and placed in a holding cell.
 
After a couple of hours, a policeman approached the cell and opened the door. She was escorted back to the booking desk where the arresting officer was waiting with her personal effects.
 
He said, ”I’m very sorry for this mistake. You see, I pulled up behind your car while you were blowing your horn, flipping off the guy in front of you and cussing a blue streak at him. I noticed the ‘What Would Jesus Do’ bumper sticker, the ‘Choose Life’ license plate holder, the ‘Follow Me to Sunday-School’ bumper sticker, and the chrome-plated Christian fish emblem on the trunk, so naturally….I assumed you had stolen the car.”

Submitted by Doria2